Episode Three : A Tenacious Trek into the Treacherous Towering Tetons

Destination: Yellowstone National Park, Wyoming

From the glaciers of Montana to the home of Yogi Bear, Dan and Greg continue on their journey. The outskirts of Yellowstone National Park is reached in the sunlight of a beautiful afternoon, and the wind is calling to the two, “Come and play with my low and high pressure boundary region.” So the two pull over next to Earthquake Lake, withdraw their kites from the car, and say, “Alright, wind. Let’s do this.” The whipping might of the air is strong, but Dan holds tight and his stunts are magnificent.

For the duration of the day the park is experienced via a motor coach ride. Of course, who would they be if they went to Yellowstone and didn’t go see Old Faithful. The geyser is so magnificent that Greg ages 25 years and goes bald. A bit of a change, but well worth it.

Soon after, the travelers search the park for a camp site. With a fortunate visit from Lady Luck, they find the last available spot. Reservations smeservations. The following day, Dan and Greg continue southward towards a more scenic part of Wyoming …

Destination: The Grand Teton National Park, Wyoming

The Grand Tetons are a spectacularly spectacular part of the spectacular Rocky Mountains. Really spectacular. So spectacular that magazines such as Wild Wyoming and Mountain Men’s Health regularly conduct photo shoots in the area. Upon learning this tid bit of information, Dan decides to shoot a seductive yet PG-rated shot of Greg while the two are hiking along their 4 mile trip to a backcountry campground. It has been sent to both of the aforementioned magazines, and promise of a cover shot has been made.

The camp site that Dan and Greg arrive at is situated along the edge of a small lake called Bear Paw. Rocks are good with digital cameras, so they hook up this picture.

The following day, a brief trek around the opposite side of the lake is made before heading to the car and onwards towards the next location of interest …

Destination: The Black Hills National Forest, South Dakota

The drive is made heading east along the northern side of Wyoming. Along the way, friends are made with the wildlife. This ram and his other ram friend hold up traffic for a good five minutes, so Dan and Greg decide to get their revenge by posting a picture of his rear on the internet. Ha, ha, ha stupid ram, joke's on you!

By nightfall the South Dakota border is crossed and the Black Hills are entered. Greg and Dan decide to stay at an inexpensive motel for the evening in a town called Deadwood. With a good night’s sleep and a shower, the two head off in the morning to see the sights and hear the sounds of the Black Hills. The first stop is the well known Mount Rushmore.

Moving on southward, the next stop is the Wind Cave National Park. Dan and Greg take a tour of a small section of one of the caves. The explored area of the caves cover an entire square mile, which includes hundreds of miles of caves within. It is much like a giant piece of Swiss cheese, but underground and you can’t eat it. Here is Dan trying to scare Greg with his I’m-a-spooky-cave-ghost-face. Didn’t work.

With the Black Hills at their backs, the two road-trippers head east towards the most hardcore national park yet …

Destination: The Badlands National Park

This park has a history of attracting some bad folks. Naturally, this negative aura lingers in the air. With no voluntary effort whatsoever, Dan and Greg feel themselves overcome with badness.

The sun sets and the evening begins as Dan and Greg are on the road once again. Stopping to sleep somewhere is an option considered, but with the next destination in mind, an all night long push is made.

Destination: Brainerd, Minnesota

Finally, at around seven the following morning, Brainerd, Minnesota is reached. The two tired travelers get out of the car to be warmly welcomed by the Macy residence. After sleeping much of the day, the evening is enjoyed by cruisin’ up the Mississippi river on a pontoon boat. The crew: Dan and Greg, Mike Macy, Erik Macy, and Dave Waby.

Despite all efforts to fool the fish into thinking that shiny things with hooks are good eats, none are caught. The Mississippi is home to many other creatures, however. Dan is lucky enough to snag some excrement from the ever-elusive Swamp Thing, which is now thought to be living the Brainerd area of Minnesota.

The following morning, Dan, Greg, and Mike are driven by Roger Macy north into Canada to go fishing at the Lake of the Woods. This is a huge lake with over 65,000 miles of coast line with tons of islands throughout. The foursome meets up with two other guys, Mike and Marv, and they all stay at the Pipestone resort. Marv is the best fisherman in the world, and he shows the less experienced how to fish well. After a little practice, Dan gets lucky and catches the ferocious Canadian Snapper Crawfish. Ouch, this looks like it hurts.

Not much later, Mother Nature decides that fishin’ time is over and she sends a big storm to scare everyone back to the cabin. Here is Greg trying his best not wet himself as the storm chases from close behind.

The following two days of fishing result in very little for Dan and Greg. Greg is pretty sure that the fish know he is from California, so they tend to bite the more experienced fishermen’s lines. Whatever.

Pipestone resort is much enjoyed for the duration of their stay. Dan, Greg and Mike participate in few games of soccer with their new buds Conner and Jim, two young dudes from Colorado. Jim is also a martial arts expert, and he proceeds to teach Dan a few of his finer moves. Greg and Mike also play a number of games of pool with two attractive young ladies, Lindsay and Kayla, who end up being no match for the pool sharks. After only five games in the billiards room, Mike and Greg find themselves twelve thousand dollars richer, and all the Coloradons can do is scowl.

After four days at Lake of the Woods, the return trip to the Macy residence is made. It is here that Dan and Greg do some serious chilling, for about ten days. There is much pontooning, sleeping in late, and enjoying the delicious culinary craft of Carolyn Macy. The time is much enjoyed, but before they know it, the road begins to call for Dan and Greg, “Yoo hoo, where are you?”

... stay tuned for Episode 4, a galvanizing experience of Wisconsin, the Windy City, and beyond ...